Lunch of Champions

I Have Made Some Decisions; Episode 1 April 21, 2008

1. Paul Rogers and Sammy Hagar should start a “vocalist for hire” firm (hey, they could call it The Firm!).

2. Unfortunately, Justin Hawkins (The Darkness) will never get the chance to sing for Queen.

3. The new Pee-Wee Herman movie should be directed by John Waters and written by Amy Sedaris.

4. My friend James thinks that the new Micheal Bolton album sounds “kinda good, it’s like Joe Cocker.”

5. Larry David and Woody Allen should star in Rush Hour 4.

6. The sound of Fred Savage’s voice as the animated blue octopus named Oswald, makes my child relaxed and provides wholesome family values.

7. I can’t seem to find an episode of Designing Women that I can quote to my friends at work. They seem to be confused by the sound of Delta Burke’s southern charm.

8. Beck and Dangermouse working together is a good thing. Beck and Nigel Godrich is a good thing. Beck and The Dust Brothers is a good thing. Beck and Air is a good thing. Beck is a good thing.

9. Wes Anderson should re-make Harold and Maude. With songs by Sufjan Stevens.

10. Guns and Roses will reunite with all original members and record a new album by 2011. Also, the Libertines will reunite in late 2009, Blur in 2010, Journey with Steve Perry by 2012, Led Zeppelin in 2009, Phish by 2010, The Smiths by 2015 (I know, that’s a stretch), Pavement for a bit by 2011, The Kinks by the end of 2009. The Police will break up ASAP.